It’s easy to become impatient when faced with a problem, however insignificant. However, frustration doesn’t really help and in many situations, patience is a virtue and one that helps us cope better with life. But it’s not always a
strength; excessive patience can be seen as a weakness, a form of apathy and reluctance to engage. So how do we strike a balance?
Patience is not innate and it doesn’t come to us naturally. A small child is impatient by nature – he wants everything straightaway; and his parents will have to be very firm and resourceful if he’s to learn that sometimes he just has to
wait. Even as adults, we retain this childish tendency towards impatience, though some of us are more accomplished at hiding it, depending on our upbringing.
It’s not easy to be patient and calm when you’re stuck in a traffic jam or an endless queue, or when faced with a serious problem or aggressive behaviour. This requires effort and is made even more difficult because of our accelerated pace
of life. But the health and psychological benefits of staying patient in moments of passing stress have been well and truly proven. Blowing your stack for every little thing brings you little good or results (nor for those on the receiving
end of your impatience!).
Patience in a here-and-now world
We live in a world where we are constantly rushed and less and less prepared to wait. The idea that things take time is becoming increasingly alien to us. We end up forgetting that nothing is ever achieved instantly, including the birth of
a child. Patience is essential for parents and educators; it’s essential for all learning. It gives you time to reflect on decisions and work out solutions. It also helps you cope better with hard work, with the unexpected and with the
disappointments and suffering that life can bring, such as illness and grief.
Patience allows time for healing and natural development. There are some situations, however, that demand something other than time and patience. Sometimes we need to be impatient, we need to react and rebel. After all, what would happen if
no one stood up against injustice, if no one opposed the unacceptable? In such cases, patience can thus be perceived as a weakness.
When taken to extremes, patience can tip over into apathy; for example, when it leads an individual or an oppressed people to give up all hope for change. Is it really a strength to accept everything unflinchingly? That sort of patience
doesn’t really improve anything. On the contrary, it thwarts progress. Totalitarian regimes understand only too well how to exploit this form of patience; and how, through oppression, they can encourage a form of passivity where human
beings will accept the most degrading forms of existence. Impatience and the desire to rebel are, therefore, essential in order to encourage people to action, to draw attention to injustice and to fight against the unacceptable.
Choosing patience or impatience
Without patience, we will never achieve anything of value, and life would become intolerable. But if patience is to be a strength, it must be combined with hope; the hope for a better future. When taken to extremes, patience leads to
resignation and futile passivity. Although everything takes time, it is only by being decisive and active that we are able to oppose what we find unacceptable.
Patience and impatience are only damaging when taken to extremes, when patience becomes synonymous with passivity and impatience with violence and greed. Both emotions are vital to us; patience helps us to resolve problems and overcome
difficulties; impatience drives us to defend ourselves in harmful situations. So don’t hesitate to choose your patience level according to what you need to bring about in your life.
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